Table of contents, Polyamory Basic:

What you can get from this book

Part I – Background & history

01. What are we talking about, anyway?
02. Reinventing the wheel: why polyamory won’t change the world.
03. So, you want to be polyamorous!
04. The usual questions
05. About swingers
06. Avoid the common mistakes
07. Overview: what polyamory actually requires
08. Other sides of the coin
09. The first fatal steps
10. Prepare your sacrifices
11. You will screw up
12. Relationship is not security
13. Communication: the big lie
14. You don’t know what you’re saying: language & metalanguage
15. It sucks to be secondary
16. It sucks to be primary
17. It sucks to be polyamorous
18. The jealousy thing
19. Swim or die
20. Vindication through sabotage
21. Polyamory or promiscuity?
22. Pregnancy, disease, legal action, and other distractions

Part II – How to actually be polyamorous

23. Core requirements of polyamory
24. Good theory & $5 will get you a double mocha
25. Lifelong intent, day-to-day attitude
26. Learning to deal with change
27. Figuring out what you are
28. What are your motivations?
29. Why polyamory?
30. Honesty: risking yourself & others
31. Friend- vs. family-oriented
32. What will the neighbors think (and should we care)?
33. Communicating with a partner or other life-form
34. Levels of attraction: define "love"
35. Love, conditional & otherwise
36. Creating a dyad
37. Problem-solving: how to fight
38. The tyranny of time
39. Hierarchy, whether you like it or not
40. Children
41. The mixed-marriage problem
42. Dating outside the couple front
43. The sexual credit bureau
44. Then, the sex starts…
45. The doubtful triad
46. Changing gears
47. Jealousy sucks, get used to it
48. Surviving the radical reversal
49. NRE: what to do when "common sense" is an oxymoron
50. Finding poly friends
51. Searching for your true love
52. We sleep together, therefore we’re partners
53. Care and feeding: relationship maintenance
54. Falling in & out of poly
55. Empower everyone
56. How open, how closed?
57. Reaching the end
58. The balancing act: multiplicity
59. Firm but flexible: to the future, right?
60. Giving up your freedom
61. Scheduling: jobs and other nuisances
62. Creating & using a network
63. Talk to each other
64. Sex vs. communication
65. Having a social life out of bed
66. Creating a household: living together as a method of suicide
67. The infamous dishwashing schedule
68. Be nice to you
69. Time out: sex has limits
70. A little more sex education
71. Signs that things are going to Hell
72. The Ref
73. Falling back in love
74. Toward a culture of polyamory
75. About this book
Epilogue: Real Community — or, Why I Sound Like an Activist

Resources: Real people in virtual bunches
Further reading

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